Defining Choices
by 1oooW0rds
Summary: The infamous Sarah and John reunion in Power of Six with a Sarah/Mark twist. Excerpt: "Sarah, it's not easy to fall in love with someone. But you know what's harder, falling out of love." AU
1. Before

Disclaimer: I do not own _I am Number Four._This is the property of Pittacus Lore (James Frey and Jobie Hughes)

A\N: This idea has been floating around in my head since reading Power of Six. If you've read Rise of Nine (which by the way I am not happy about.), you would know that this version of Sarah doesn't exist. But I like her with Mark and that's why there's fanfic.

I should be working on a huge group project but since my group decided they don't care, I don't either. I hate group projects and finals and stress and other crap college causes.

Sorry. Anyways, please read and review. It's unbeta but I really wanted to put something out in LL to prove I'm not dead.

Part 1 – Before

"Go to sleep, Sarah." The television before the blond girl switched off as the image of the somber eleven o'clock news anchor flickered away. Sarah turned to see her father standing there in his light blue bathrobe pulled over his striped pajamas. Nathan Hart observed his eighteen year old daughter with worried eyes. "You've been obsessing over the news lately. Is this extra credit project really worth it?" Without answer her father's question, Sarah shut her notebook and stood up, stretching her tired limps.

Nathan noticed the slight frown on her young features. Her usually bright blue eyes lost her curious shine only to be replaced with a dullness that was disconcerting to Nathan. Her blond hair curled at the ends, tickling her chin. Sarah's eyes had a distant look as she walked towards her father, heading towards the stairs behind him. He recognized that look and who it's associated with. "This isn't healthy think about that boy." The affect was instantaneous and it broke Nathan's heart. Sarah's spine tensed like a rabbit when a twig broke. Her eyes widened and then narrowed as she looked at her father's face. He reached over and pulled his daughter into a tight hug, kissing her forehead. "I'm worried about you."

Sara closed her eyes, slowly allowing the tension to leave her body and savored the warmth her father was providing. "This isn't about John." She lied against the cotton fabric of his shirt. There were moments like this were Sarah wished John didn't happened to her. Where she wished, she never met the Loric boy and falling so in love, her world just stopped turning. "We're studying the rise of technology and its' effect on our generation." Nathan looked skeptical but allowed the girl to slip out of his embrace. "Dad…"

"Yes, well, unless technology can turn back the clock, you still have to go to bed." Sarah opened her mouth to respond but another voice did instead.

"Technically, Mr. Hart, we can turn back the clock. It's called Daylight Savings." The daughter-father pair looked up to see a young man exit the kitchen. He stood there dressed in a loose navy suit without a tie. A friendly smiled graced his lips as he innocently sipped his glass of water but Sarah's eyes narrowed at the sight of him. "Hello Sarah." He greeted as she pulled away from her father.

"Good night, Carter." She replied back. Agent William Carter was in his late twenties. He was Sarah's least favorite agent who was sent to babysit her. Unlike the other agents who were old or a bit overweight, Carter was fit like a college soccer player he was. He was easily six feet tall and so handsome that it bothers her because she doesn't mind having him around. Sarah walked up the stairs only to pause when Carter said something.

"I hope you behave Ms. Hart." Something about his implication caused a shiver to go up Sarah's spine. Sarah blinked and stared at him as he bided Nathan a good night before retiring to his post in the living room. Sarah leaned forward against the rail when she caught a glimpse of Carter slipping his hand into his jacket, pulling out a phone. "Carter here. Hmm… no, she's still here."

"Sarah, stop being nosy." Nathan whispered into his daughter's ear as he gently pushed her up and followed her up the stairs. "Carter isn't too bad." Sarah scoffed at her father's comment. He wasn't the one who had various FBI agents tailing and watching his every move. She was slowly growing tired of her entourage. For the past month, she's successfully lost five FBI agents. "And try to be nice to Carter; he's just doing his job."

"Only if he's nice first." Sarah whispered back before opening and closing her door. She could hear her father sigh before shuffling to his bedroom where her mother was happily sleeping away. The quietness of her room surrounded her as she leaned against her door. Through the darkness, Sarah could make out the silhouettes of her furniture. Her bed was pushed beside the window, allowing the soft moonlight to filter through the curtains. She shuffles through the room, feeling her way to her closet and mindlessly pulls off her sweatshirt and jeans for a comfortable outfit. Like always, Sarah's mind begins to wander to the certain boy with blond hair and bright blue eyes.

It's been six months since John left with Sam and Six. The days were marked on Sarah's calendar, reminding her about the time which seemed to move despite herself feeling so trapped. Sarah reached out to touch the crisp paper of the calendar, grabbing her sharpie to cross off another day. Little notes were scattered around the calendar, reminding her of projects, papers and social events in Sarah's near future. _Life continues… _She thought, brushing her finger over a red circle remind her of college applications.

She didn't want time to move forward like her father painfully reminded her. She just wanted John to return and then life could move on. As long as he was beside her. Sarah sighed in frustration, running her fingers through her blonde hair. "You're so stupid." She murmured, pulling on a loose jersey and a pair of sweats. "He's just a boy… A stupidly wonderful boy…" Thankfully before Sarah's thoughts could linger on the Lorien boy, her phone vibrated violent on her nightstand.

Releasing the screen lock and navigating through a series of screens, she finally pulled up her messages. Emily's text sat there. The white texts stood boldly out against the black background.

**Emily: I have a problem.**

A tiny smile teased against Sarah's lips as she sat on her bed, leaning against the sturdy wall. Emily isn't the type of girl who 'has problems.' She's a whirlwind with vibrant red hair and quick wit. Emily solves problems before they become problems. That was why Sarah liked her so much. Rapidly, her fingers tapped against the virtual keyboard, sending her message out.

**Sarah: ****And what kind of best friend would I be if I didn't help you.**

The next text came almost instantly.

**Emily: Not a very good one. There's a guy I want to ask out. We've been talking and I've known him for a while and I think I really like him but… everyone knows he's still in love with his ex.**

Sarah paused, reading over the words slowly. _Who is charming and sweet enough to turn proud confident loud Emily into a shy little school girl? _She thought as she laid down against the comforters, slowly typing out her response.

**Sarah: Anyone I know?**

Closing her eyes, Sarah mentally ran through the possibilities. Even since the school was destroyed, half of the students attended Oakland High School while the other went to Ridgewood. Sarah and Emily were split since they lived across town from each other. Sarah attended Ridgewood with Emily at Oakland.

_There's Cash. _She thought, recalling the flirty boy. He was eye candy during the summer when he waitressed at the Chief, a local diner. Cash was smooth in a playboy way that girls' couldn't help but like. He never dated anyone to Sarah's knowledge and hid his emotions with his poker face. Cash flirts, smirks but never dates.

Dan was another possibility. He was Mark's best friend, a jock from the old Paradise team like Cash. Unlike the jerky jocks that most of the football team consisted of, Dan was so sweet he could cause cavities. He's the type of guy who would offer his coat for any poor freezing girl and hold doors open for as long as people keep passing through. His sweetness could be annoying at times because Dan is a bit of a pushover. If Emily liked him, she might just break sweet old Dan.

Sarah was almost half-asleep when her phone finally vibrated, signifying Emily's text. It took much longer than usual which should have been Sarah's first hint to something being wrong. She tapped the text message and read it with sleepy eyes.

**Emily: It's Mark.**

Sarah wasn't sure how to react. The sleepiness disappeared from her body as she sat up, reading over the two words, seven letters and two punctuation marks. Another text came quickly, snapping Sarah out of her stupor.

**Emily: Are you ok with this?**

_Am I? _Sarah thought, setting her phone down and lay flat on her bed, staring outside the skylight in her room. The stars twinkled against the dark clear sky, unaffected by the turmoil about to brew in Sarah's heart. Instead of replying like usual, Sarah set her phone down and closed her eyes, listening to the distant sounds of her father snoring and Agent Carter's muffled speech. Slowly her thoughts turned to the boy with brown eyes and hair with his charming smile.

"_Damn it, Mark." Fifteen year old Sarah muttered as she glanced around the semi-empty Paradise High Library. She glanced at her cell phone as she browsed nooks and crannies between the large shelves. Pressing call and placing the phone against her ear, she waited for him to pick up. "Where are you?" She murmured, pausing as she heard the tall-tale sound of a phone vibrating against a hard surface._

_Peeking around the corner, Sarah was met with the sight of Mark with his head rested against his arms. A notebook was open beside him with notes on their assignment, a project about the characters in __The Great Gatsby. __He was breathing softly, dead to the world. Sarah's eyes softened at the sight. It was pretty sad. Mark looked completely exhausted with almost unnoticeable bags underneath his eyes. Last night was the state championship game which Mark singlehandedly lost for Paradise for miss throwing the ball into the other team's hand. Silently pulling the chair beside him, Sarah studied the face of the boy she knew for a majority of her life._

_Mark's body has matured following his growth spurt that summer. His face was slowly losing its baby fat, leaving defined angles. He always had a handsome face with a boyish charm. Sarah shook her head, quickly look away from Mark's sleeping face, mentally scolding herself. _Gosh Sarah, it's just Mark. Just simple old reliable Mark. Even if he suddenly looked a lot cuter than before…

"_You know, it's not polite to stare." Sarah turned and glared as Mark yawned and sat up, stretching his long arms and cracking his back. He ran his fingers through his short hair and gave her a sweet smile, "morning."_

"_It's nearly three, genius." She replied back curtly, forcing her heart to calm down as it beat rapidly against her chest. "Are you almost done with your side of the project?"_

_Silence greeted Sarah before Mark swore underneath his breath. He quickly grabbed his backpack, pulling out his notebook. "I'm so sorry, Sarah. I'll finish it right now. I just have to – hey!" Sarah pulled his notebook out of his fumbling hands._

"_You're exhausted, Mark." She said, holding the notebook as far away as she could. Mark tried to reach around her, unconsciously wrapping his arms around her in a bear hug. "Mark…" Sarah muttered as she turned her head, realizing how close they were. Mark quickly pulled away, looking away with a bit of blush peppering his face. "Hey, I can finish it. We're ahead of schedule anyways. Sleep. You look like a raccoon with those bags underneath your eyes." Her fingers gently touched his cheek, tracing the shadows._

"_Mother hen…" Mark muttered before laying his head down on his arms, watching her as she opened his notes, studying his surprising neat handwriting. "Thanks…" he murmured before drifting to sleep. Sarah smiled to herself slowly reading over his notes._

"_You know you owe me a dinner for this." She whispered jokingly._

"_It's a date." He murmured back._

That was their first date. Mark kept his promise and they went out. It was surprisingly fun with Mark taking her out for dinner and then a peaceful walk around the lake. One date turned into two and then another. It slowly became a common sight for Sarah to be waiting on the bleachers for Mark or Mark helping with the cheerleader bake sale. Sarah smiled sadly at the thought of her old boyfriend. They were still talking, the strain from their break up finally eased over after the craziness of the Lorien and the damage they left behind. Mark was still the compassionate young man she remembered. _No wonder Emily is smitten with him. _Sarah thought, returning to her current predicament.

The sharp sound of her phone vibrating against her nightstand caused the girl to jump. Reach over; Sarah absentmindedly tapped the text icon without looking at the number.

**Unknown: I promised I'd come back. U up?**

She stared at the text, confused by the random number. _John? _She thought, her heart leaping to her throat. _No, that's not possible. Think, you stupid girl. _Sarah thought, sitting up and shutting the screen over, closing her eyes. _It's probably some stupid prank from the kids at school. _Sarah frowned, knowing exactly who was cruel enough to play the joke. "It has to be… you can't be back." She murmured in the darkness of her room. Once again, the phone vibrated and Sarah flicked it open.

**Unknown: I love you. I'm here.**

Allowing herself to indulge in fake memory, Sarah imagined John's voice whispering those words as he wrapped his strong arms around her waist, enfolding her in a warm hug. _It's not him. It can't be him. _Again, the phone vibrated in her hand.

**Unknown: Bernie Kosar misses you.**

Sarah's heart dropped and she quickly flicked on the lamp, blinking against the sudden brightness. Once her vision cleared, she reread the words. _It's him… _she thought, fingers flying over the keyboard. It was a wonder she didn't miss any keys.

**Sarah: Is it really you? You're in Paradise?**

She held her breath, waiting for a reply.

**Unknown: I'm outside. Meet me at the playground in 5?**

Grinning, she texted quickly.

**Sarah: I'll be there. :)**

She jumped out of her bed, quietly shuffling through her closet for a dark outfit. Her mind was whirling with thoughts of John, finally being able to see him, knowing he's ok. As she tugged on her sneakers, Sarah glanced up at the white winter cap hanging on her closet handle. The last time she wore it was when she spoke with Mark about John.

"_What should I do if John returns?" Mark glanced up from his menu, tilting his head in confusion. They were sitting at the Chief's, the diner which they frequent when they dated. Sarah never brought John here and Mark hasn't really dated anyone after Sarah. The diner was their place, as Paradise locals, as friends, and as a couple. Sarah nervously tugged at her long hair, biting her lower lip, waiting for her friend's answer. The light business card should be unnoticeable but it felt like a weight in her pocket._

"_Not if but when." Mark corrected, return his gaze to the menu as if he was brushing her aside. Sarah smiled slightly, reassured by Mark's confidence. "I assume you would fall into his arms and ride off into the sunset." Sarah's blue eyes narrowed, wondering if she heard a bit of resentment in his tone. At that exact moment, Mark looked up, a playful glint in his brown eyes and winked at her. "I'm kidding, sweetie. But really, what's wrong?" Silently, Sarah reached into her pocket and handed the card to Mark. He looked unimpressed by the formal print of the FBI issued business card._

"_They want to keep tabs on me, since I'm a person of interest." Sarah explained, turning her head just so to catch sight of the man a few booths away from them. Her parents had agreed with the FBI agents. Sarah should be constantly watched over just in case John returns._

_Mark scoffed and threw the card back, leaning back with his arm draped over the faux leather cushion. "Explains why that guy kept on giving me weird looks." Mark murmured before grinning at Sarah. "I was gonna head over and tell him I don't swing that way." Sarah chuckled and shook her head, pulling her white beanie off._

"_John would be safer if they took him in." Sarah started, steering the conversation back to more serious topics. By the way Mark's eyes darkened, he didn't agree with her reasoning. She just knew without Mark saying anything. They were friends since childhood. Mark leaned forward, placing his forearms against the table and gave her a concentrated stare._

"_Would he, Sarah? Use that pretty little head of yours and think." Mark started, tapping his fingers against the table. "Why did John move into our little town this year? Because his last home wasn't safe. Because maybe they found him there and he needed to run. Would John truly be safe sitting in a jail cell? Isn't just easier for them to find him?" Sarah turned away from his intense gaze and looked at her fingers which were violently twisting her napkin._

"_Things are just so bad…" she whispered, half-hoping Mark couldn't hear her. The memory of the taunts and jeers of the students from her school replayed in her head. She slowly looked up and saw Mark's clenched jar and angry expression in his eyes. Mark was the only person who truly understood her situation. He was the only one she could discuss it with. But unlike Sarah, he wasn't bullied for protecting John. Mark was the golden boy at his school, taking over the football team and potentially propelling them to State. When they did throw a taunt at him, Mark would just counter with a sarcastic smile and witty comment. "I miss him." Sarah confessed, look at her hands again. Mark slowly reached out, covering her small hands with his larger one, squeezing it gently. _

"_I'm not John, but I'm here." Mark whispered, caressing the top of her hand with his thumb. A tiny unnoticeable spark passed between them and Sarah could feel her heart unconsciously sped up._

_The moment was lost when the waitress intruded to take their order. Mark slide his hand back and greeted the teenage waitress with a friendly smile. They chatted, both attending Oakland High, allowing Sarah to compose herself. She peeked up and noticed the girl as she placed her hand on Mark's shoulder. The dark turtleneck accented Mark's broad shoulders and expansive chest nicely. He chuckled politely at something before turning to Sarah. "Are you awake?" He asked, a teasing smile tugging at his kissable lips._

"_Yes!" Sarah replied, blushing, and rattled her order to the girl. The waitress scribbled down the orders impassively but gave Mark another flirty look which he brushed off. "You two were friendly." Sarah replied, trying to chase away the jealous tone which crept into her voice._

"_Dan likes her ass." Mark answered with a shrug. Sarah could only cover her face and tried not to smile too wide. Mark chuckled too, chasing the tense mood away. "I know you, Sarah. You're strong." Sarah mentally shook her head, disagreeing with him. There were moments of weakness where Sarah would search through the web, looking for tiny hints of John, Sam or Six. There were times she would sit in her father's truck, resisting the urge to take it out, chose a direction and drive for miles searching for them. Sarah pulled out her phone, pressing the power button and glanced at the last photo of John she had, the one she hid from the FBI._

"_What if John falls in love with another girl?" She asked, finally voicing her immediate fears. Mark blinked, not expressing the question and scratched his cheek, searching for an answer. Sarah flushed and turned away, faking a chuckle. "You should have seen your face, Mark. I was joking." They both laughed and fell into a normal conversation like Mark's sister or Sarah's brother. It was almost normal and unstrained, well as unstrained as two people who were a couple could be._

"_I could have paid, you know." Sarah complained as Mark held the door open, allowing her to walk out first. Mark rolled his eyes and followed, tugging his winter coat closer to his body. Sarah shot him a scolding look which would look more intimating on a puppy. "This chivalry act is a bit annoying."_

"_Yeah, yeah. You know you love it." Mark replied instead, leading her to where their cars were parked. He draped his arm around her shoulder, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk. Sarah gasped as his warm breath fanned her face. "Very inconspicuous, your body guard." He whispered, nodding his head to where the man suddenly stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, trying to look busy. Sarah chuckled and wrapped her arm around Mark's waist, pulling him into a tight hug which he returned in equal force. She inhaled his woodsy scent and its familiarity. "Sarah, it's not easy to fall in love with someone." He whispered pulling away a fraction and started into her bright blue eyes intently. Once again, Sarah's pulse jumped and the sound drowned everything out, everything but Mark's deep voice. "But you know what's even harder, falling out of love." _

"I need to call him." Sarah said as she grabbed her cap, pulling out her phone and pressing speed dial three. She paced the floor, counting the rings and dreading every passing second. "Pick up Mark, please." She murmured, wondering why she needed to hear his voice. The phone clicked and Sarah released an audible sigh.

"Hello?"

"Do you remember that day at the diner?" The words just rushed out of Sarah's mouth like she couldn't hold them back any longer. "Mark, what did you mean?" She could hear rustling over the phone as Mark sat up. Her hands were shaking and she needed answers now. "Mark."

"Do you have any idea what time it is?!" Mark exploded an angry bite to his words.

Sarah took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. "At the diner, what did you mean?" She waited half a second, allowing the boy to process her response. "Please…"

"He's here, isn't he?" Mark said instead. There was an edge to his voice and all traces of sleepiness disappeared. Sarah nodded her head, leaning against the wall as Mark's voice washed over her. "Sarah… what does your heart want?" _I don't know. _She thought, listening to his steady breath on the other side. _I want to be happy. I want John to take me away so we could be happy. But I don't want to lose you. I can't lose you… _Sarah closed her eyes trying to fight the tears threatening to fall. Mark sighed at the lack of her answer. "I meant what I said, Sarah. Please don't do anything stupid," he murmured before an audible click ended the call.

"Too late…" Sarah whispered as she turned the screen over and placed the phone into her pocket.


	2. During

Disclaimer: I do not own _Lorien Legacies._This is the property of Pittacus Lore (James Frey and Jobie Hughes)

A/N: This isn't my best writing. I will admit that. The dialogue between Sarah and John made me want to cringe. It's just so sappy I had to cut some stuff out. Re-reading and writing this scene made me think John's a little sissy. I tried to interject some Mark/Sarah between the John/Sarah. A huge shout-out to **proud shipper **for leaving an awesome review and reminding me there are still readers out there. I'm currently on vacation so updates may be slow but I have a project planned for when I'm back.

Part 2 – During

Sarah slowly eased the door closed, winched at the sound of the door clicking. She paused, waiting and listening to the sounds of the house. Her father's deep snores could be heard along with her mother's lighter breathing. Creeping towards the stairs, Sarah peeked into her little brother's room. Corey was sleeping with his facedown against the pillow. His dirty blond hair stuck up in various directions. A tiny smile tugged at her lips as she closed his door before descending down the steps.

"Isn't it a little late for a midnight stroll, Ms. Hart?" The blonde cringed at the sound of his voice and her foot slipped, hitting a creaky step. Sarah sighed and looked up, meeting the FBI's agent's dark eyes. He smiled from his relaxed spot in the Hart's arm chair, arms relaxed as his thumb flicked various keys on his smart phone.

"Just getting a drink, Carter." Sarah replied, placing her hands into the pocket of her jacket. She noticed the man as he looked at her warm coat. "In my coat…" Sarah sighed, walking towards the man and tried to look sad. She was grasping at ideas in her mind before settling for one. "I'm going to see Mark." Carter's head tilted to the side, a little surprised by her answer.

"Your ex?" He asked and Sarah nodded her head. It didn't feel like a lie but more like a half-truth. Carter looked at Sarah like she was a logic puzzle and he made a mistake somewhere, he just couldn't find it.

"I'm not a prisoner, am I?" She asked, pulling her arms around her tiny form. "I miss him." Her chest unconsciously clenched and Sarah wasn't sure which _him _she was referring to. Carter sighed and walked over to the door. His jacket opened slight, just enough to reveal the holster and gun safely secured at his side. Some incoherent buzzing came from Carter's ear piece but the man barely reached to the feedback.

"You're not a prisoner, Sarah." He said, calling her by her first name. The lock clicked loudly as it flicked the deadbolt. Sarah felt the tension leave her body. She was free. Another soft buzzing came from Carter. The agent opened the door and Sarah walked by, pausing at the door to look at Carter's dark eyes. "But remember, there's a terrorist on the loose." For some reason, his friendly advice sounded like a threat. A chill ran up Sarah's spine but she ignored it and walked into the dark without looking back.

Her sneakers crunched loudly against the loose gravel of the trail, heading down a familiar path. The wind was biting her face, blowing her blonde hair over her shoulders. The girl shivered, curling inwards to conserve what heat she could. Mark's whispered words still rung in her ears as she stared at the dark surroundings. _I meant what I said. _"I meant what I said." She repeated, biting her lips as she looked at the playground.

It was the same as she remembered. The woodchucks were spread underneath the huge play toy and slide to break anyone's sudden fall. The swings sat a good distance away, swaying in the breeze. The moonlight illuminated the merry-go-round as it squeaked and slowly spun like ghost children were playing on it. Sarah smiled at the playground, recalling a distant memory.

"_Catch me if you can!" A little boy with dark brown hair and eyes shouted from the top of the slide. He stuck his tongue out and ran off with the other children. Five year old Sarah growled in frustration and took off, already knowing who she was going to tag next._

"_I'm going to get you, MARK!"_

Sarah laughed at the memory, not even trying to fight them off. Paradise was littered with memories of the two of them in various stages of their lives. They grew up together. On this playground, he pulled her into his group of friends. On the streets, Mark helped chaperone her younger brother during Halloween, offering his coat to help fight off the cold October air. Everything seemed to have a linger memory of Mark. He was her first love and for some reason, she kept on going back to him.

Sarah sat on the swings, recalling when Mark would push her on it; slowly bring her higher and higher. She leaned her head against the rope, remembering how soft and strong his touch was. How he would always guide her safely to the ground and greet her with a breathless kiss, leaving her craving for more. Sarah sighed, hating how much she loved the memory.

"I love John." Sarah whispered, sitting down on the swings and mindlessly twisting around. She does love him. She loves John so much it hurts to be away from him but whenever she's with Mark, the ache subsides that it's almost bearable. Mark is her best friend, no matter what happened between them. They were each others' confidant, silently supporting each other regardless of their stupid decisions. Their history was entwined together so tightly, Sarah couldn't remember a time where Mark wasn't there. "And I love Mark." She won't deny it, her heart was split between two wonderful guys. "I'm a messed up girl."

"Hey beautiful." Sarah looked up at the sound of his voice, all memories of Mark fading into the background as John stepped out of the shadows. His voice was scratchy and raw but she knew it was his. Her heart pounded painfully against her chest as she looked at him, not believing her eyes. _John, John, John. _His name repeated in her head with each step he took towards her. Sarah struggled against the swings, trapped by the twisted ropes and reached out to touch him. John caught the top, laugher in his blue eyes as he untwisted her just enough to pull her close. His lips slanted over hers before she could say anything and Sarah's heart soar. She felt whole again. "Sarah…" He whispered into her ear, cradling her close. She wanted to smile. She wanted to cry. "I've missed you so, so, so much."

"I can't believe you're here." Sarah whispered, pulling back to look at him. He was covered in cuts and ashes but the smile on his face erased it, making him look like the boy she remembered from high school. His blue eyes were bright as he traced her face. John's hair was super short, almost none existence but she didn't care. He was here in front of her. "This can't be real." He kissed her, proving how real he really was and she welcomed him. He showered her with kisses, cherishing every part of her. "Somebody got a haircut." Sarah whispered as the adrenaline from seeing John finally worn off.

"Yeah, it's my whole tough-guy-on-the-road look. What do you think? You into it?" He smiled and ran his fingers though his hair. His arm still held her securely against him.

"I am." She replied, placing her palm on his chest. His heart was beating fast, maybe even faster than her own. "But you could be bald for all I care." He stepped back and looked at her, studying every little detail. She did the same, marveled by how much John has changed. His shoulders were broader, filling out his form. There were tiny cuts along his face and dark rings underneath his eyes, making him look older than sixteen. He looked so different but he was still John, right? He was still her John underneath the changes.

"I've thought about you every single day, Sarah Hart." He declared, reaching out and encasing her smaller hands with his large ones. Sarah never realized how big John's hands were. She smiled, blinking away the tears threatening to fall from her face.

"I promise I've thought about you twice as much." He lowered his head, kissing her hands and pressed his forehead against hers. They just listened to the silence, savoring the moment.

"It's so hard to be away from you." John whispered, lifting her hands and kissing each cold finger. Sarah blinked at the gesture. A memory of Mark slipped through their happy moment as she recalled how Mark would blow on her icy cold fingers before rubbing them warm. _I can't let my good luck charm freeze. _Sarah pulled away from memory and John, who barely noticed, still talking. "I'm constantly thinking about what it feels like to touch you and hear your voice. I've come close to calling you every single night." Another memory slipped under her defenses.

"_Do you know what time it is, you crazy girl?"_

"_Sorry, I just want to hear your voice."_

"_God, now I sound like a bad boyfriend. Sorry Sarah. You know I love you."_

The line between reality and memories blurred and Sarah reached out to touch John's face, trying to focus on the boy in front of her and not the one in her mind. Her fingers caressed his lips, but her mind was recalling another pair. _I don't deserve you. _Sarah thought as she spoke to John. "I've sat in my dad's car so many times just wondering where you are. All I needed to know was which direction and I would've started driving." _Would I? _Sarah questioned her own words. _Could I really leave everything for a boy? _"I want to come with you, John." The words slipped out of her mouth before she could take them back.

"No, it's way too dangerous." John dismissed, pulling away from her. A look of angst crossed his face as he looked at her. "We just finished battling fifty Mogs over at Sam's place. That's what life is with me right now. I can't put you in the middle of it."

"John, you know what people say about you. That you're a terrorist and a murderer and you hate the United States." Sarah started, allowing the words to tumble out of her mouth. All the pent-up emotions just started spilling out. She couldn't stop it even if she wanted too. "Guys at school call you names like Bomb Smith. My parents say you're a dangerous and I'm never supposed to talk to you again no matter what; and an added bonus, there's a reward on your head. People always talking about shooting you." John reached out to hold her but Sarah stepped back, needing the space. He needed to hear this, hear what she was going through. "I've almost lost every friend I had. I'm new at my school and everyone thinks I'm this weirdo." The pressure of everything came crashing down and Sarah was surprised she was still standing. Tears she tried to hold back started falling from her face as she looked at John. So much has happened after falling for him.

"Things won't always be this way." He whispered like those words could just fix everything. Sarah knew they wouldn't. He can only do so much.

"I love you so much, John. But I can't imagine how we're going to get out of this mess." Sarah pleaded, recalling Mark's words from the diner. _He's not safe in prison. _Even though Sarah knew it, she allowed the words to leave her mouth. "Maybe you should turn yourself in."

John looked at her like she was a different person. Maybe she was. She has changed too from the time apart. "I'm not turning myself in, Sarah." His voice had harden into something she didn't recognize but then quickly softened. "I just can't. We'll get out of this. Of course we will." _More magical words. _Sarah thought as John pulled her close, tucking her underneath his chin. "My one and only love, Sarah. I promise, if you wait for me, things will get better."

_I don't think I can wait. _Sarah thought as the tears continued to fall from her face and her phone buzzed in her pocket. Pulling away, she slipped it out, peeking at the screen. Mark's face appeared on the screen with his message beside him.

**Mark: If you're with him, get him out. Something's happening. **

"Who's texting you so late?" John asked, looking like he wanted to peek at the phone. She quickly slipped it back after looking at Mark's face once more.

"Just Emily," she lied, not knowing why. "But John listen. Just turn yourself in. I don't want to lose you over and over again." John didn't answer her and instead stepped close, cupping her face between his large warm hands. She didn't know why but she needed him to be here in Paradise so her stupid heart can decide between the two boys. Sarah clenched at the end of his torn t-shirt, trying to ground him here.

"Listen to me, Sarah. I can't turn myself in. I can't sit in a police station and try to explain how an entire school was destroyed and how five people were killed. How am I supposed to explain Henri? Those documents they found in our house? I can't get arrested. I mean, Six would absolutely kill me right now if she knew I was here talking to you." Ice ran through Sarah's veins at the mention of the other Loric girl.

Sarah stepped away from John, needing to be away from his warmth and sat on the bench. Her thoughts were spinning. She wanted John to stay here. She needed him to go for his own safety. She wanted him here with her, away from Six. Six, the girl who was just like John in every way possible. The girl who was extremely brave, strong and pretty. Her heart clenched and the green-eyed monster reared its ugly head. Even John's presence couldn't pull her out. "Six is very pretty." She murmured, recalling the girl's shiny dark hair and hazel determined eyes.

"She is." John agreed without thinking before backtracking. But the damage was already done. Sarah didn't hear his compliments as he tried to repair the damage. She stood up and away from John, regarding him with cool eyes.

"Have you kissed her?" She sounded bitter and Sarah hated herself right now. She was thinking about Mark during this whole thing and now she was accusing John of this. _I'm a horrible person._

"What?" John asked, taken back by her accusations.

"Answer me." She half-shouted, needing to know. She allowed jealousy and loneliness to seep into her words accompanied with just enough anger for a kick. John shook his head and stood up; reaching for her but her pride wouldn't allow it. "It's a simple question, John. Have you kissed her?"

"I haven't kissed Six, Sarah. We haven't kissed." He shouted, looking at her with angry eyes. "I love you." The last phrase sounded like a sad attempt to fix whatever was breaking between them. She wasn't sure she wanted to fix it now. Sarah hugged herself, hating the dark thoughts. "It doesn't matter what's going on between me and Six. Nothing is going on. Sarah, I love you, so Six doesn't matter. No other girl matters!" It sounds like he was trying to clean up the mess that exploded between them with his words. So many words but so little meaning.

"I feel like such an idiot." Sarah whispered, tilting her head down and looked at her hands. They were shaking as she held the ends of her long sleeve coat.

"Stop, please. Sarah, you're misinterpreting everything!"

"Am I, John?" She bit back as her vision blurred from the tears she was shedding. She wasn't sure she could see things straight. Her mind was jumbled with thoughts and various things were tugging at her heart. She looked at John, committing to memory and felt her phone buzz against her side. She knew it had to be Mark. "John, I've gone through so much for you." She said and flinched away when John tried to touch her. _This was a mistake. A huge mistake. _She thought.

"I want to be with you, Sarah." John promised, pouring all his emotions into his words. Sarah wanted to shut them out but she listened because it was John and she kind of wished his words could fix them. "Nothing I say right now seems to come out right. All I can really say is that I've spent weeks missing you terribly and there hasn't been a single day that I didn't think about calling you or writing a letter. I love you. Don't doubt that for a second."

"I love you too." Sarah echoed, stepping away. _And maybe it's enough, _Sarah thought, looking at him. _Or maybe it's isn't. _A soft rustling sound came from the corner of her eyes. She turned and gasped as Sam, awkward lanky boy she remembered, appeared from the forest. "Sam?" She sighed before rushing over him and pulling him into a bone crushing hug. Sam buried his head into her hair and she hugged him even tighter because he was part of Paradise.

"Hey Sarah. It's really good to see you." He said before pulling away. His brown hair was messy, falling over his big brown eyes covered by his father's glasses. "But I'm sorry, Sarah." She knew he was sorry because Sam's chocolate brown eyes could never lie. "I'm really, really sorry and I know you guys haven't seen each other in a long time but John and I need to go. We're in a lot of danger. You have no idea."

"I sort of do." She replied, remembering the FBI agents who tailed her, remembering Carter's cryptic message. Her eyes widen and she pulled her phone out, remembering Mark's message. She turned away and pulled her phone out. **GET OUT NOW! **Someone grabbed Sarah around the middle and she dropped her phone. The man pulled her away from the boys. Sarah screamed over the man's shoulder as she watched a cloud of smoke explode at Sam's and John's feet. People rushed from all sides with guns drawn and aimed at the boys. Sam was on the ground, struggling against a huge man as he drove his knee into the boy's back. On his blue jacket, yellow words were printed clearly: FBI. _No…_

"Don't move! Put your hands on top of your head and get on your stomach! You are under arrest." Sarah turned her head and gaped at Agent Carter Williams standing there with a megaphone in hand. He looked dispassionate as a man kicked John in the stomach and painfully pulled his arm behind him. Sarah pushed herself off of the man holding her and turned, unable to watch the scene in front of her. The empty streets were full with FBI issued vehicles. People wandered from their houses to witness Bomb Smith's arrest. She wanted to hide her face from the crowd but stopped when a friendly face appeared.

"Mark…" She whispered as the boy pushed through the crowd. He was panting from his sprint. His brown hair fell over his eyes as he watched John and Sam before him get escorted into a car. He slowly turned to Sarah. She dissolved into tears at the disappointed look in his eyes.


End file.
